My Blood

CD1: On Wed, I was in NYC for work and couldn't call my clinic.

CD2: On Thurs, I called the clinic and the answering service (who was kind of rude) said that the clinic is closed on Thursdays... well ok then.

CD3: On Friday, I called the clinic at 8am when they opened and asked if they could take me for the CD3 bloodwork that day.  She said "Didn't we give you a 'script for it?"  Well yes, they did, but they told me that was just in case CD3 fell on a weekend.  I told her that, she sighed and told me to hold on.  When she got back on the phone she said that the bloodwork lady was soooo busy and that was a lot of blood to take and... well, couldn't I just go to LabC.orp?  (Btw, I HATE going to those places, I've had bad experiences with them not giving a shit and treating you like garbage.)  I'm a push over and I say, "sure".  I get directions from her and hang up.

I knew I was going to be late to work, which was fine, but I had to be at work by 11:30am for a conference call.

I arrived at the address and drove around the corporate park area looking for the building number, which I didn't have.  Finally found it, went in to a very empty waiting room, signed in, and waited for about 5 mins.  She called me up and I handed her my 'script and started to hand her my insurance card.

"Oh we don't take that insurance."

I look at her.  She looks back at me. "Yeah, they don't have a contract with us." Sigh.  So I ask how much it would be to just pay out of pocket.  I seriously was thinking about doing it just to get it over with.  She tells me about $500 and I decide to save myself the money.  She can tell I am defeated because she asks if I know where this other place is.  Well, sure, I know where that address is but given that it's after 10am now, and that place is at least 20 mins away, there's no way I'd make it to work in time. Ah well.

I called the clinic when I got to work and told them and they apologized for sending me someplace that doesn't take my insurance.  I know I should have called them before I went there, I just didn't think it would be an issue.

CD4: On Saturday I decided that I would stop by the other place to get it done quickly before R and I go on with the rest of the day.  But silly me doesn't call the office until 11am and they close at noon on Saturdays. I suck.

Summary: No CD3 bloodwork for me.  Better luck next cycle.

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My grandpa died one year ago today.  I'm not one to put a lot of meaning in a death-day.  I don't feel any different today than I do on any other day except to be amazed that a whole year has passed already.  I miss him the same amount every day.

Every day I feel the same amount of sadness for my grandma that she has to go on without him.  For 32 years of my life they were a pair, never one without the other in my mind.  Now, for the past year, it is only her. That's hard to get used to.

We usually host Thanksgiving at our house (have for the past three years anyway) - I love the preparation and cooking and having everyone at my house.  I think it's my favorite holiday.  This year I decided to go and be with my grandma instead of host it at my house.  I've never celebrated Thanksgiving at her house before.  There will be a good amount of people there so hopefully the hustle will keep her mind off of last year for the most part.

When I get there on Thursday morning, that distinct, gruff voice won't greet me by saying "Jilly's home!" as I walk up the basement stairs to the kitchen.   I won't get to chat with him from my favorite place at the counter, as he sits at the dining room table, leafing through a newspaper and chewing on a toothpick.  I won't ever see him fall asleep in his living room recliner, to the late news on TV, as grandma and I chat in the other room.  He won't ever cook me pasta again or laugh over the fact that we like it al dente and grandma likes it mushy.  I'll never again see his flowers and tomato plants growing in the front yard, or see the bags of vegetables and garlic that he grew, around their house.

But, I'll remember all those things forever.

Always Unexpected

{girly-talk warning!}

Well, yesterday I spotted just the teeniest bit and today is apparently CD1. Weird. And good. I was either on CD117 or CD43. Annoyingly long. Waiting can kiss my ass.

It's very light but I'm just going to go with it.  I'll call tomorrow and then hopefully have my CD3 bloodwork on Friday. I'm very glad I don't have to choose to take the provera.

I looked back at my FF notes and apparently I had a little ewcm about 14 days ago. Interesting. I suppose it's too  much to hope that the glumetza and exercise are helping but it gives me some happy thoughts about this coming cycle.

New Patient Fertility / GYN Appt - 10/28/09

It went fine I guess. When I was filling out all the new patient paperwork I actually was able to write truthfully that I exercise ~3 times a week and jog ~2 miles each time. That was cool. I’ve never been able to write anything like that before.

The one and only doctor at this place is a man and I prefer female doctors. I was told over the phone that if I needed anything done to my hoo-haa a nurse practitioner would most likely be the one to do it. Well, I met with this main doctor (Dr. M) and to my surprise, he busted out the dildo cam on our first date… err, I mean, appt. I was definitely not expecting a u/s but who am I to turn one down! Apparently I can survive an exam by a man.

There was also a female doctor, who seemed to be learning, following Dr. M around. They were both very thoughtful and made sure I could see the screen of the u/s. I hate those silent u/s’s where they don’t let you see what's going on and don’t say a word throughout the whole thing. As I laid there staring at the screen, I tried to imagine what it would be like to see an actual baby.

Just like all my other u/s’s, they saw both ovaries and there was no sign of cysts even though I specifically asked about the “string of pearls” symptom of PCOS. He also measured my lining, and even though I haven’t had a real flow in over a year, my lining was very thin.

Dr. M of course thinks I have PCOS and put me back on glumetza. I’m taking it now and haven’t had many side effects but I’m only up to 2 pills a day. The goal is 3/day. I’ll probably make it there at the end of the week.

I want more information than just his guess that I have PCOS. He order a bunch of blood work for me to be done on CD3. Uh yeah, that’s a problem. When the eff is CD3?? I never freakin get a real period. Right now I’m either on CD110+ or CD30something if I count the last time I spotted (off and on for about 3 weeks) as a period. I told him this and asked him if I should take provera. He said sure and wrote me another script. He says I should count any spotting at all as CD1. Ok then.

My appt was a few weeks ago now and I haven’t taken the provera yet. The “what-ifs” get me every time. What if this cycle is the one and only time I’m going to ov this year and I take provera to end the cycle? Missing that non-existent opportunity scares me for some reason. It shouldn’t – I know I’m being stupid. I just need to take it and get on with the blood work. But what if the blood work gives me no additional information again? *sigh*

Overall the appt was fine and I like the office. They were all very nice but no matter how much I told them that I’m not interested in IUI/IVF/etc at this time, that’s still their main focus. I have a feeling he wants to try me on clomid again. I guess I wouldn’t be opposed as long as they monitor follicle growth (or lack of) at the same time.

Week 9 (Goal Reached!)

FINAL WEEK!!!

Week 9 Instruction: Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 3 miles (or 30 minutes).

Note: Again, (and from now on I think) I only timed the actual jogging portion. Counting the warm-up and "cool down" (walking to get back home or to get back to the car) we probably go an average of .5 miles in addition to the mileage listed below.

Day 1 – 10/29
Run time: 30:12
Run Distance: 2.11 miles
Ave Pace: 14:20/mi

Day 2 – 11/01
Run time: 30:13
Run Distance: 2.13 miles
Ave Pace: 14:12/mi

Day 3 – 11/03
Run time: 30:13
Run Distance: 2.08 miles
Ave Pace: 14:34/mi

Neither C or I were worried about bumping up to 30 mins. We did repeat week 8 but only because we wanted to keep ramping up very slowly. On Day 1 we weren't intimidated by the 2 extra mins and we were able to push through to 30 mins without much problem.

Right at the beginning of the run on Day 1 the bottom of my right calf/top of my heel (maybe my achilles tendon area?) started hurting. It felt very tight, like it was cramping, and it wasn't an ache, more like a bit sharper pain. I have no idea what it was from. It wasn't really bad, just something I noted. I ran through it and it didn't get any worse, but it didn't get better either. I tried to stretch it out well afterwards. I continued to notice it while just walking around after that.

On Day 1 we went around the little loop (my neighborhood) once, and around the big loop (adjacent neighborhood) three times. On Day 2 we went to a new area of the local bike path. This day was much tougher for some reason. We both felt really tired and C ended up stopping to walk for a min or two near the end. She caught up to me though. Looking at our pace, maybe we were just going slightly faster than usual so we tired more quickly. My achilles tendon area hurt again on this day, but it was a little bit better.

On Day 3 we repeated our course from Day 1. It was very cold and windy out - pretty unpleasant for jogging. I have a zip-up sweatshirt that I wear but half way through my core gets too hot and I have to take it off. However, my thighs and my butt are always freezing! I'm going to have to get something to wear under my jogging pants for the winter.

Day 3 was pretty crappy. Along with the cold and wind, I felt completely uncoordinated and weak. I know this will happen sometimes but it sucked that it happened on the very last day. We wanted to celebrate but instead we had to concentrate to make it all the way through. We usually talk quite a bit but we were pretty quiet on this day trying to make our bodies to what we wanted.

We made it though! Week 9 completed! We are proud!

C and I are celebrating this weekend by going out to dinner at The M.elting Po.t. She's never been and I've only been there once. It should be fun :)

It's really amazing to me, especially if I go back and read posts from the early weeks, that I'm now able to jog without stopping for 30 mins. We even jog for most of the 5 min warm up now, instead of walking.

My achilles tendon pain was yet a bit better on Day 3 and now I'm pretty sure it's gone. At the very beginning (last March/April/May) I had very tender shins but this time around, and all the way through to week 9, I haven't had that issue. My knees I can't quite figure out. I continue to have almost no knee pain when I run but my knees hurt when going up and down stairs. They always did but it seems as if it's a little worse now. It could be just normal aging-with-arthritis stuff. I plan on going to an orthopedist next year if I continue with the running. Just to make sure I'm doing all I can to preserve what health my knees do still have.

The biggest difference I have noticed (I really started to notice in the past few days) is my breathing. I used to breath so hard that I could barely swallow. And I'm not talking on the longer jogs. I'm talking during jogging for 3 or 5 mins this would happen. If I had to swallow, I would breath a few times and then hold my breath while I swallowed quickly. It was unpleasant. Now it's totally different. I don't have to think to swallow anymore. I breath much more easily, even at the end of a 30 min jog.

I haven't ever managed to get back that magic "I could jog forever" pace. I think I've been close a few times. Jogging always with C is a factor I think. We talk which takes more energy and makes it so that I can't inwardly focus very well. I wouldn't change it for the world - I love going with her - but jogging alone seems to be a different experience.

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So, now my first goal is complete.

My overall goal is still to jog regularly for a year ('till the beginning of Aug 2010), but I need a new short term goal. I'm not sure what it should be yet.

C and I need to figure out what we are going to do now. Should we just continue jogging for 30 mins, 3x, every week? Should we go back to the beginning of the couch to 5k plan and jog for distance this time instead of time? Should we work on jogging more often?

I'm not sure I will ever want to jog for more than maybe 30-45 mins but maybe that will change. I always imagined myself jogging about 3 miles, 3x or 4x per week and that's it. I'm interested in doing 5k's eventually but a 10k? I'm not so sure I'll ever be that good or even have the desire.

Decisions, decisions...

Week 7 and Week 8 (Three Week Summary)

Whoa, I am still jogging! I know, it's amazing. To me it is anyway :) It's been forever since I've posted an update so here is a summary of the last 3 weeks. The program I'm following is here.

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(For weeks 7 and 8 the instruction is the same for all three days.)

Week 7 Instruction: Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.5 miles (or 25 minutes).

Note: Total time for all days on week 7 would be 25 min jog + 5 min warm up = 30 mins. Walking at the end (any time over the 30 mins) throws off our actual pace so days where our pace is crappier were days we walked longer to get home.

Day 1 – 10/8
Run time: 33:48
Run Distance: 2.11 miles
Ave Pace: 16:01/mi

Day 2 – 10/11
Run time: 38:20
Run Distance: 2.15 miles
Ave Pace: 17:48/mi

On Day 2 we went to a different place to jog. I was hoping it was going to be a bike-path type area in the woods but to our joggy dismay it was more like hiking on a little dirt path with a lot of small hills. The hills killed us - we are not used to doing any incline at all. We had to walk a lot but tried to jog as much as possible. If not for jogging though we would have really enjoyed ourselves. It was a beautiful little spot and only about 5 mins from my house.

Day 3 – 10/13
Run time: 32:01
Run Distance: 2.13 miles
Ave Pace: 15:03/mi


Week 8 Instruction: Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.75 miles (or 28 minutes).

Note: Total time for all days on week 7 would be 28 min jog + 5 min warm up = 33 mins. This week, to get a sense of our true jogging pace, I started only timing the actual jogging portion and leaving out the warm up and any walking we may do to get home. On Day 2 I wanted to time to 2 miles even because we were almost there at the end of the 28 mins. On Day 3 I'm not sure what I did - possibly timed the warm up but then stopped it right after the 28 min jog was done.

Day 1 – 10/15
Run time: 28:14
Run Distance: 1.89 miles
Ave Pace: 14:55/mi

Day 2 – 10/18
Run time: 30:05
Run Distance: 2.00 miles
Ave Pace: 15:03/mi

Day 3 – 10/20
Run time: 33:15
Run Distance: 2.20 miles
Ave Pace: 15:09/mi

(Then we did week 8 over again)

Day 4 – 10/22
Run time: 28:07
Run Distance: 1.89 miles
Ave Pace: 14:51/mi

Day 5 – 10/25
Skipped jogging this day. C and I went for a hike instead. We didn't measure it but it was probably ~2 miles total and we tried to walk at a brisk pace the whole way. Took River with us - he was soooo happy to be included and he got to wade in the river a little too.

Day 6 – 10/27
Run time: 28:06
Run Distance: 1.93 miles
Ave Pace: 14:32/mi
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C was with me on all days. I mentioned this before but she has really been a huge help for me with sticking with this. We both think it sucks and we both are determined to continue. It is also nice to be able to get together at least three times a week and chat about whatever. I'm truly grateful to have such a great relationship with my sister.

I was able to jog the 25 and 28 min intervals without stopping to walk at all. There are days that are tougher and that we really have to talk ourselves into making it to the very end, but I did them all. C has a tendency to go faster than me; so, on rare occasions she has to stop and walk for a few mins, but that probably only happened once in these three weeks.

We are not working on increasing our speed at all. The intended speed is still very much out of our reach at this point (1.93 miles instead of 2.75 miles on week 8, day 6). We do try to either keep about the same pace or beat our last pace by a bit.

Mostly we jog at night, in my neighborhood and in the adjacent neighborhood, doing different combinations of loops. On the weekends we try to get out (in the daylight *gasp*!) and go someplace different like a bike path or that hiking trail.

On all days, except week 8, day 5, I did anywhere from 100-140 crunches. I'm still not seeing much of any weight loss or clothes fitting me better but I do think my abs are improving a little. While doing the crunches, I can now crunch up higher than I could at the beginning.

I've basically given up on the wall push-ups. I didn't do them at all in these three weeks. We still do a ton of stretching - briefly after the warm-up and then an extended period after jogging. I am paranoid about injuries so I probably do way more stretching than I actually need. IMO you can never have too much (if you are doing them correctly) and plus, it feels good.

Speaking of injuries, there was nothing to report in these last three weeks. There is usually a good amount of pain involved but nothing that sticks around for more than a day.

This all feels both like a big accomplishment (just look how far I've come from a couple months ago! not to mention that I've never exercised regularly before this EVER) and an insignificant accomplishment at the same time. It continues to be so hard to get out there and go, and the jogging is very difficult in the first 5 mins and at the end. Overall though, I think we are proud of what we're doing and we still want to continue.

My Weekend and An Upcoming Appt

R is traveling for work. He left on Sat (10/24) morning and he'll be home later today. This marks the longest I've been home alone without him. There have been nights when he's had to work, or a weekend day when he was gone and I was home, but I'm usually the one who does the traveling. I travel to NYC for work (though I haven't now since early this year) for multiple days or I go off to visit my grandma and leave for the weekend.

Two nights by myself in our king size bed was weird!

However, I don't mind. I like to be by myself every once in a while and being at home alone for 2 days/2 nights was kind of like "playing house", except opposite. Instead of "playing house" with a "mommy" and a "daddy", I was "playing house" as a bachelorette ;)

Don't get me wrong, I missed R like crazy and can't wait for him to be home tonight so I can give him a kiss and a snuggle!

Of course, I wasn't really alone. River was with me almost every single moment. Velcro-dog that he is. And, C came over for a while on both Sat and Sun.

But at night, I was alone. I pottied the dog, fed the cats, got ready for bed, made sure the house was in night lock-down, and went to sleep... alone. Reading back, this seems silly and like no big deal. I guess it's just the fact that it almost never happens so it was a little adventure.

And I only freaked myself out listening to weird noises a few times! hehe

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C and I had a very nice weekend. On Sat we decided to make a big dinner so we hunted through recipes, made a shopping list, and went shopping. It was rainy all day which = one very bored dog, so I took Riv with us in the car.

We decided on an herb roasted pork loin with onions, apples, and squash. It was delicious. I don't have the recipe with me (it's from a magazine) and I can't find it online or else I'd link to it. The pork was sort of "dry rubbed" with nutmeg, garlic, and sage, then browned in butter and roasted in the oven to finish it off. The apples, onions, and squash were put together with some garlic and honey mustard and baked. There were some things we'd tweek a little if we made it again but it was a very yummy recipe.

We also made spaetzle for a side dish from this recipe. I had never heard of spaetzle before (apparently neither has blogger!) and had just seen it that morning on a foo.d netw.ork show. I love trying new things and it looked like fun to make. It turned out well - like an eggy homemade pasta in butter. yum. I will definitely be making it again. Suggestion: if you try making this, when you remove them from the boiling water, put them in a strainer first, then into the buttered bowl. At first I was getting a lot of excess water in my bowl, even though I was shaking off as much water as I could.

There were big plans to make a pumpkin banana tart for dessert but there was too much food as it was.

We watched Mama Mia while we ate. Very girlie (imo) but I love musicals (and so does C) so it was enjoyed. Funny thing - the main character is named "Sophie" and maybe half way through I turned to C and said "awww Sophie/Sophia is such a cute name!" (C and I talk baby names sometimes) and C shoots me this just slightly worried look. So I said "oh, was that one of your baby names?" and she said "yeah...". Hah poor girl probably thought I was going to steal it from her. Not that she has anything to worry about. Who me? Have a baby? um, not.

On Sun we got together again and made these oatmeal cookies. They are so good! I'm eating one right now (just ate leftovers from Sat's dinner for lunch!) I really like crispy cookies and the orange zest in this recipe adds something really nice. We also went for a hike with River. It was chilly but a really nice day. Ahh autumn... I wish it could stay colorful and crisp outside and just not turn into winter.

I also got laundry done and a whole mess of dishes (since there were dirties before we even started all our crazy cooking! and now there are only a few). It was a very nice weekend.

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So, I POAS this morning. It, of course, was negative. I already knew it would be but I'm a special kind of crazy and I hadn't peed on something since June! haha

Seriously though, I looked back at my FF logs and I haven't had much more than spotting for over a year now. The last day I was able to guess was "CD1" was in July. I am so very broken. I watch those "I didn't know I was pregnant!!" shows and alternate from thinking to myself, "wow, how the heck could that even happen?" to "shit, that could totally happen to me!" No period for months on end? normal. Fatigue? normal. Fluttering/pokes in abdomen? eh, intestinal issues. Cramps? who the f knows. Weight gain? normal (see above weekend food orgy).

If I didn't POAS every once in a while I swear (if some sort of freak miracle occurred), I could end up on that show!

Because of all this, a few weeks ago I made a gyn appt at a new-to-me fertility/gyn clinic. It is for this Wed morning. The place is related to the fertility clinic I went to in the spring of '08 but this one is a non-fertility related gyn in addition to the fertility stuff. The big fertility place was all about getting me pregnant and not about figuring out what's wrong. I want to be pregnant more than anything but ART is not for us right now (and maybe ever). I want them to help me figure out why I barely ever get a period and why (I think) I don't ovulate.

I'm assuming nothing of any value will come from this appt. I'm jaded and I don't believe doctors can solve any of my issues. I've seen doctors for many different things and have been let down so many times. But with a new place comes new possibilities so... maybe it could be the start of something good.

Bloggy Award and Playing "Catch-up"

Yeesh, I've been away for a while. I'm so late with this but I was tagged for a blog award by Flying Monkeys and Justina. Thanks so much you two! You are both my very first taggers ;)

I can't for the life of me figure out how to get the award pic to show up in this post but the link to it is:
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_xW-FcR9yKRA/Ss4EBp1gY1I/AAAAAAAAAV8/NaDfzHaF5-w/s1600-h/Over+the+top+award.jpg

Rules for the Over The Top Award:
- USE ONLY ONE WORD! It’s not as easy as you might think. Copy and change the answers to suit yourself and pass it on. It’s really hard to use only one-word answers so try your best. (I totally agree with Flying Monkeys - parenthetical thoughts don't count!)

- Tag 6 other bloggers and let them know that you think they are 'Over the Top'!

1. Where is your cell phone? desk
2.Your hair? frizzy
3. Your mother? unforgiven
4. Your father? dead
(4a. Your father ('cause I have two)? microbiologist)
5. Your favorite food? thanksgiving
6. Your dream last night? forgotten
7. Your favorite drink? water
8. Your dream/goal? sahm
9. What room are you in? office
10. Your hobby? jogging
11. Your fear? vomit
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? happy
13. Where were you last night? home
14. Something that you aren’t? thin
15. Muffins? yum!
16. Wish list item? baby
17. Where did you grow up? MA
18. Last thing you did? emailed
19. What are you wearing? glasses
20. Your TV? timesink
21. Your pets? messy
22. Friends? missed
23. Your life? frustrating
24. Your mood? stressed
25. Missing someone? always
26. Vehicle? silver
27. Something you’re not wearing? watch
28. Your favorite store? Williamsb.urg (this is not a store, it's the town in which my favorite store is)
29. Your favorite color? many (I don't really have just one - I like bright colors and earth tones. If you assumed from my clothes the answer would be brown.)
30. When was the last time you laughed? yesterday
31. Last time you cried? yesterday
32. Your best friend? R
33. One place that I go to over and over? work :(
34. One person who emails me regularly? blogger (ok, so that's not really a person)
35. Favorite place to eat? anywhere!

I tag the following people (and I promise I won't be offended if you don't play along, especially because I'm not sure if any of these people have been tagged for this already):
Heather
IF Optimist
kate (Bee in the Bonnet)
Journey Girl
Kate (Living the Dream)
Kate (The Waiting Room; also, she could also use some hugs if you want to stop by her blog)

Hah I know a lot of Kates in blogland apparently!

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I'm still jogging. We just finished week 8 and are going to start week 8 over again tonight. I have two weeks of updates to post. But I haven't quit yet! Just had to put that out there! Our goal day of completing the entire thing is set to be Nov 2nd.

I got some comments on my last post praising me on my motivation. Thanks so much to all of you for the compliment but... Seriously? What motivation?? I really don't feel like I have any motivation at all. Which makes me think, maybe I'm wrong. I suppose I could just not be going out there three times a week. But, all I can think about is that I should be doing BETTER or doing it MORE OFTEN. I dunno...

On most days I have to literally drag myself out there kicking and screaming. I hate going. It hurts, it's so crappy to feel like that for a half hour. But then, afterwards, I feel good. It's so odd. If I didn't have my first goal of getting all the way through this 9 week program I would have quit long ago. Just knowing that it feels good afterwards is not enough to get me out there. C is a huge part of why I haven't given up yet. She is working towards our goal too so on the days one of us is throwing a tantrum (usually me) the other one helps motivate. I might be still doing this if she wasn't going with me, but probably not.

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I have a blogging problem. I read too many blogs (and try to comment as much as I can) to actually update my own blog on a regular basis. I obviously can't read blogs/write posts all day long and I'm having trouble finding a nice balance. Every day I think about posting, but then I end up only reading others' blog posts and then the day is over.

I also have a problem blogging about bad things. I have before but I think really letting it all hang out (so to speak) would be helpful for me. For whatever reason, when I'm really upset, I don't want to hash it all out again. Shame? Denial? I really have no idea.

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I've been feeling really crazy lately. Work is making me lose my mind. The problem is, I don't think it's this job in particular. I think it's just any job mixed with my mental stability. I'm not a good enough writer to explain this well but, most times, when I'm at work, I feel like I just can't handle it all anymore. Stress, anxiety, fear, sadness, restlessness - something is making me go absolutely bonkers at work (and at home when thinking about work). It's not fun and it's making R crazy too having to watch me freak out over and over. I'm thinking about looking for a therapist/counselor/psychologist.

Last week R and I took a week off from work. I felt really happy most of the week. I thought it might help with my craziness but as soon as I got in on Monday, I fell apart again.

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We didn't do anything specific for our vacation. We got some things done that would be harder to do while working. We both went and got eye exams and new glasses - something I haven't done in two years (even longer for R). I cleaned out half of our garage. We hung around and watched TV, played computer games, and just enjoyed not working. It was nice. I wish I could be on vacation forever! :)

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Hmm I have blogging back-up here and there is much more to say but this is getting really long.

Happy ICLW! If you are here reading my blog for the first time and got hit with this post... oops! sorry :)